Over the weekend, I attended a birthday party for 1-year-old twins.

There were THIRTY-FIVE kids there.

I swear, by the time the 3-hour nightmare of screeching, stomping, crying, animal-balloon popping, beverage spilling, and diaper soiling had ended, my ovaries had shriveled up so completely that I'm certain they've been reabsorbed by my body, to be expelled during my next - and final - menstrual cycle.

*shudder*

LiveJournal. Yeah. I remember LiveJournal. Good times.

Thanksgiving was good. It's always been my favorite holiday. When I was little, it was the only holiday we hosted at our house, which meant no frenzied rush to Grandma's or an aunt's house only to sit around for hours watching dumb sports on TV and being ignored while the men played cards and the women gossiped about distant relatives I'd never met. No, when the Thanksgiving meal was finished, I could retreat upstairs to my own room and play with my toys or read or watch TV in blissful solitude.

Thanksgiving also was (and still is) the best meal of the year. I know many Italian families who serve a pasta course on Thanksgiving, and some even forsake the turkey altogether in favor of more traditional Italian holiday dishes, but my family never did. We always kept it strictly traditional - turkey, stuffing, potatoes, lots of veggies, pumpkin pie, etc. More than likely, it was the only turkey dinner we'd eat all year. But everything was delicious, and it was a nice change from the lasagna or baked ziti that was served on every other holiday of the year. Not that those meals aren't delicious too, but they tend to get old after the 3,405th serving.

I'm really glad that Thanksgiving was early this year - it's nice to have a bit more breathing room between now and Christmas to finish all of the shopping, baking, and assorted crap. I like Christmas, but I tend to stress out too much over gift shopping - this is the time of year where my antisocialness comes back to bite me in the ass, because I have no clue what my cousins, aunts & uncles, etc. would actually like as a gift since I socialize with them so rarely. I'll probably end up getting everyone gift cards - maybe that's lame, but I'm going to do my best not to stress out too much about it this year. And I'm planning to supplement the gifts with some awesome homemade cookies, which are a guaranteed hit. No one can resist the call of the peanut butter kiss cookie. ;-)

Speaking of which, I'm off to chow down more yummy Thanksgiving leftovers. I hope everyone had a great holiday!

Hee! I just noticed last week that I have the same cheap wooden coat rack as the family on Ugly Betty!

( The proof )

(But, hey, at least mine still has all of its little hook thingies attached!)

I'll be spending the next 10 days or so waiting impatiently for THIS to arrive. :-D It's coming out tomorrow, but of course Amazon is prolonging the agony by refusing to ship it to me until Saturday.

I'm not sure what impact, if any, the DVD rerelease will have on the website. I'm eager to see how accurate this turned out to be, but I'll have to take a good, long look at the new DVD (and all those shiny extras!) before I figure out how to proceed with other parts of the site. No point in copying info or photos that are already in the companion booklet, or screencapping the old DVD if the new one has better video quality, etc., etc., etc....hmm, perhaps I'll just devote the entire site to Beatlegs instead! I think that section is more popular than any of the "HELP!" content, anyway. ;-)

Because I'm a nerdy showoff, I'm going to keep track of the (hopefully) 100 books that I manage to read in the next 1001 days. I've already started the first two (it's impossible for me to focus my attention on a single book at a time). I'm hoping to get through them fast because I'm dying to read #3. Anyway, I'll add more to the list as I finish them. Suggestions welcome! :-)


( Literary goodness )

I've grouped everything into categories, but they'll be completed in random order. I apologize for all the long-winded parenthetical commentary.

Completed tasks are in bold
Tasks in progress are in italics
The rest are tasks I haven't started yet.

START DATE: October 27, 2007
END DATE: July 23, 2010 (I think.)

Last updated: November 25, 2007

( The List! )

Well, howdy!

I can't believe it's been nearly a year since I've posted here (and two years since I've posted with any regularity). Surprisingly, not much has changed in my life in the meantime. I'm still in Jersey, in the same apartment, with the same car, working the same job. I'm still single, and I still look roughly the same (except with a lot more gray hairs, and a lot less acne. A fair exchange, I think). I have neither lost nor gained any family members. Rutgers is still kicking a surprising amount of ass. I haven't started any new online projects, and I'm still neglecting the old ones. So why the hell am I posting here now? Well...

Long, long ago, in a web community far, far away, the fount of good ideas that is mizmojorisin introduced me to the concept of 101 Things In 1001 Days. In an effort to stave off the mounting depression due to the fact that I'm turning 29 tomorrow, I've finally finished compiling my list. I'll post it here tomorrow - I just wanted to post something first to ease back into this whole LJ thing. And, of course, to deliver the exciting non-update above.

Does this mean I'm blogging on LJ again? I'm not sure yet. I'm planning to blog more often, but I haven't decided if it'll be here or elsewhere (most likely both). If it's elsewhere, I'll inform all three or so of you who might actually give a crap. The "101 Things" list will stay here, though, because I'm not planning to share it with anyone who knows me personally.

See you tomorrow!

A TV meme (stolen from squarishpeg). I have no clue why this one particularly appealed to me, but there go you.

( Good lord, I've forgotten how to do lj-cuts! )

I believe I may be the first person in recorded history to ever slice her finger open on a clump of dishwasher fluid.

It was a deep slice too, complete with Dan-Aykroyd-as-Julia-Child-on-SNL blood squirty goodness.

Ow.

Happy birthday, paulismine! You WILL be assimilated to the Cult of MySpace, if only so I can leave you ultra-trendy sparkly graphic comments on occasion. ;-)

I'm all hepped up on coffee right now, so here are a few random thoughts:

Why has the weather in Jersey been so fucked up lately? On Tuesday, it was so warm that I didn't even wear a coat to work. Then we had a freak snowstorm yesterday. Now it's nice again. I'm expecting the plague of toads any day now.

Am I the only one who thinks of that damned Fleetwood Mac song every time I hear about that new show "Big Love?"

How DO you pronounce "Raconteurs?"

Why does my upstairs neighbor insist on vacuuming her bedroom at 7:00 every Friday morning?

What's up with this "Current Location" option on LJ?

Is anyone actually reading this?

Happy birthday, babysinblack64! I think I've hit all of the places we usually see each other. ;-) Hope you're having a great day!

Ah, my poor, neglected little LJ. I'm not even going to offer an excuse for my absence this time, or promise to contribute more often, because we all know that just ain't gonna happen. Which is a shame, because I could really use the writing practice. Several friends and other interesting folks have been blogging at MySpace instead of LJ, so I've been spending a lot of time over there lately, but I think I'll keep my own rambly entries over here for the time being.

P.S. to dangel - I had a great time meeting you last month! Hope you did too. And I'm sorry I ragged on you so much for complaining about the cold. ;-)

I've been laughing my ass off at this 'Garfield' thread all week. The link's been popping up everywhere over the past few days, so you may have already heard of it. Hey, it's one of the most important discoveries of our time - word's bound to travel fast!

Basically, it's a demonstration of how the Garfield comic is umpteen times funnier if you remove all of Garfield's dialogue (but not Jon's). I've included some examples of my own below the cut. And no, I don't have anything better to do with my Saturday nights. Why do you ask?

( With apologies to Lorenzo Music )

It's 15 degrees out right now. Winter can bite my ass.

As you've probably heard, we're having a record-setting blizzard here in the Northeast. I'm not sure what the official snowfall total is where I am, but it's at LEAST 20 inches. AND IT'S STILL SNOWING! ARRRRGH!!!

Here are some photos I took around 1:00 PM today, for your amusement:

( I'm too tired to think of funny captions, sorry )

Note to self: Never attempt to apply lipstick shortly after receiving a shot of Novocaine. Unless you want a disturbing preview of life as a stroke victim.

I trudged through the baby departments of 4 different stores this week, searching for hair accessories for Niece #4 (who will be celebrating her first birthday on Saturday! Time flies, huh?). Middle Sis had specifically requested hair items - bows, barrettes, headbands, anything - but I couldn't find a single one. The stores had hair accessories for women, and for young girls, but nothing for infants. Thus validating my long-held stance that putting stuff in babies' hair is stupid.

Speaking of stupid, I just learned that Dave Barry has retired. Apparently he stopped writing his column over a year ago, but somehow I failed to notice. I owned several of Barry's books as a teen, and no author has ever made me laugh harder, or longer. He's taught me so much about comedy, about writing, and about the utter ridiculousness of life. His work will be missed.

Now, go read Big Trouble if you haven't already.

Why is it that whenever I post something to my LJ after a long absence, I'm immediately dropped from several people's friends lists?! Is it something I said, or does my unexpected appearance on their friends page spark something in peoples' minds: "Wait, who...? Oh yeah, I remember her. Why the hell is she still on my list? I should have deleted her months ago!"

Heh. It' not that I'm angry, or particularly surprised. Hell, at least half of my remaining friends have left LJ for good, and very few of the active half actually read my posts. The timing just struck me as funny.

For a while, I was actually considering making this a "friends-only" journal, simply to alleviate the paranoia that certain family members or coworkers might somehow wander in here and recognize themselves. But, I now realize that's a bit like installing a Lojack on an '89 Ford Tempo.

Hee hee, my Congressman is on The Colbert Report right now.

OK, so this entry is a day later than promised. Which, considering it's me, is downright impressive. See, I really am starting the new year off on the right foot!

Anyway, here's my half-assed explanation for why I pretty much disappeared from LJ-land for 3 months.

( Excitement! Intrigue! Football! Puppetry! )

And there you have it. Three months worth of verbiage, in one handy post!

Happy Birthday, dangel! And, um, a belated "Happy Birthday!" to anyone who celebrated one during my 3-month LJ hiatus.

Happy New Year, too, come to think of it. Oh, and Merry Christmas and/or Happy Holidays! And, what the hey, Happy Thanksgiving. And Halloween. I think that about covers it.

More to come over the weekend. No, seriously. I mean it.

I have so much to report about the various cool happenings of last week (Macca! Improv! Bono! Puppets!), but I've got to get up at the asscrack of dawn tomorrow so I can outrun the rising floodwaters around here. Stupid planet, be more temperate!

And if that wasn't enough...earlier this evening, I spent a good 2 1/2 hours staring at Paul McCartney's ass.

All things just keep getting better.